The Siege of McDonaldland

The Siege of McDonaldland was a military conflict between Nazi Germany and McDonaldland on March 12th, 1944. The battle resulted in heavy McDonaldland casualties, with light Nazi casualties. This was the battle in which Mayor Ronald McDonald was captured, and sent to a concentration camp.

Events prior to the battle
Home to many family-friendly child mascots, McDonaldland was a threat to Nazi Germany. Chancellor Ernst Chocula demanded that his top general, Frank N. Berry launch a full-scale assault on the city. One of McDonaldland's top generals, Craig Grimace, met with Chancellor Chocula to beg him not to invade the city. Chocula smiled, then grimaced, and slit Grimace's throat on the spot. General Berry then declared war on McDonaldland, and started the march to the city.

The Day of Battle
When Germany's forces marched up to McDonaldland's gates, Mayor McDonald bluffed and said that "Germany's forces could not survive" from on top of the wall. General Berry laughed, took this as a challenge, and had his Panzers roll over the flimsy walls of McDonaldland with ease. Only finding out about the planned siege at the last minute, the citizens of McDonaldland were unprepared. They were ran over, crumpled, and crushed by Germany's military power. Ronald McDonald fell off the broken wall and shattered both his kneecaps on impact with the ground. He let out a shriek of pain akin to a dog that was set on fire. He was apprehended by German soldiers, and taken away back to Germany. He was then sent to a concentration camp, where he would eventually die of typhus in 1945. The German Wehrmacht were told to spare no citizens and to take no prisoners, and they did exactly that. Every civilian in sight was fed a buckshot sandwich. Those who were lucky enough to not die fled the scene, and left McDonaldland in ruins. The Germans stormed the Play Palace, which was the McDonaldland government headquarters. General McCheese hid there, waiting for the Wehrmacht men to storm the building. He set multiple tripwires hooked up to shotguns assembled to the ceiling, and as the invaders ran in, they were shot down. Nineteen Wehrmacht soldiers died because of this. The rest of the soldiers figured this trick out, and disabled the traps. While they were doing so, McCheese saw this as an opportunity. He and what little army he had left fled the scene, leaving McDonaldland for dead. This was the end of the battle, and McDonaldland was lost. The Nazis had won. There was no hope.

Aftermath
For months after the battle, the Nazis garrisoned their men in the McDonaldland ruins, as it was a strategic position. But eventually, the Allies defeated the Nazis there at the Battle of the Golden Arches. McDonaldland's independence was restored, and the citizens slowly returned and rebuilt there. Later, during the Cold War, McDonaldland became a superpower and nuked the Burger Kingdom.